January 2011 - went by in a very very work induced haze unfortunately. Still a bit fuzzy to be honest.

I came back from Texas and it was back to the daily grind. Hurumph. Super happy to see Josh after 9 lonely days away from him, but part of the reunion was a little disappointing for me. For 2 quick seconds I'll recap my own pathetic feel sorry for myself moment. It's stupid. Are you ready? It was our FIRST christmas and we didn't get to be together and I had gotten over that, kind of. Well first of all, Josh is soooo hard to buy for! He knows what he likes and is rather picky, plus he would be very disappointed if I spent much money. So what in the world do I get?! I consider myself to be a pretty good gift giver, but was at a complete loss while shopping for him in Texas and felt the pressure of the "first gift" thing too. PLUS his birthday was Jan. 7th so I had that looming as well. I opted for the last resort option which was his specific gift request: a sweater that had small zippered neck which I was happy to find they were in style and Macy's was having last minute sales, bonus. That also meant slim pickings and it seemed everything that caught my eye was out of his size :( Long story short, ok not really, I found 2 "ok" sweaters and they were complete failures. *sigh. They were ugly and didn't fit him. I told him we'd go shopping and get him something else... It's February 5th and we still never have. With him working weekends it's not like we run many errands together, but it's mainly that he will not let me buy him anything while on my huge budget crunch. So there you go, first xmas not together and I gave him nothing. Sweet. Everyone says it's not a big deal, but the firsts are fun and a big deal at the time and mattered to me. A few years down, sure, we'll have a good laugh at my sucky gift giving. Plus he did pretty damn great on my gifts - dingus! Got me a hat from a little old and well known hat shop just down the street from my place in north beach, I love hats, and a cookbook for idiots. Ok, not really "for idiots" but it really is a cool cookbook that gives you secrets to cooking and will hopefully rid me of some of my cooking anxiety! Maybe...

For Josh's birthday he enjoyed the afternoon with his sister and friends while I worked and then I met them at a bar and from there Josh and I did end up having a very cozy and romantic dinner at Dopo near his place. It was pretty fantastic. Great food and great conversation :) I gave him a coupon I bought for 2 (him and a buddy) to go play paintball sometime. Then I was informed that it's not really that fun with only 2 people and more fun with a group. Sweet, another fail. :( Well, on the bright side he definitely does not love me for my money or awesome gifting skills.

That's it. The rest of January has been almost 7 days a week constantly working mostly due to lack of help in one office and new/difficult clients AND then me trying to do a more than usual impressive job on all this chaos so as to make manager later this year. After 7 years I better!! This on top of my random 2+ weekly babysitting gigs, trying to make time for Josh, the chiropractor and gym time... which was seriously once a week because there was NO time. I've been exhausted constantly.

So it's February. Fingers tightly crossed Josh can get the days off he requested so we can go on our "first" (yes, setting expectations super low) little vacation. I just want to relax and actually spend more than 12 hours in a row together! Just a road trip up north and staying at a friend's house.